Author Archives: Allison Bethurem

I love parties, gatherings, fiestas, soirees… etc. You name it, I’m down to go! With all of the tech events in the bay area, we have our pick of something to attend almost every night of the week. And most of us that go, watch a cool demo, chit chat, have a cocktail and brace yourself for the next day of work.

It’s when that invite says ‘cocktail attire’ requested, when most of us stop and say… ok, now it matters what I wear.  So I have to think twice about it and make sure I’m dressy enough, but not over the top. What if I wear too many accessories and try too hard? What if I’m too boring? Wonder what she’s going to wear or he’s going to wear? It’s endless and adds extra stress to the event, but it doesn’t have to.

My boyfriend and I got invited to a cocktail party on Saturday, and he immediately said, “Ok, I’ll get out my khaki slacks and button down.” Me = look of terror and SCREECHING HAULT to the conversation. I said, no no no! Time to get out of the cliches of oh-so-boring menswear and expand your horizons to the new standard of men’s cocktail attire.

These days, all khaki slacks should be burned and replaced with sleek dark denim. And not the shredded and torn to pieces, ‘I’m trying to be too trendy’ kind, but just a nice, solid pair of denim. No need for a stuffy tie anymore and bleached, crisp white button down either. You can replace that with a loose, rolled-up-sleeved button down, solid or print. No need for polished shoes you can see your reflection in, throw on those loafers with a few scuffs that have been worn in. It adds some character and no one will be looking at your shoes anyway! Now, this outfit, jeans, lose button up and loafers is pretty much the standard that I’ve seen at almost every tech event I’ve been to since I got into this field, but just in case anyone missed this new trend for guys at events and cocktail parties… I thought I’d share the wealth!

As for all the ladies and our cocktail appropriate attire… we’re lucky because our options are endless! Cocktail dress, jeans and heels, pencil skirts, pleated skirts… I can go on and on. And most of us don’t need too much help! But, if you’re having a day when you’ve tried on everything in your closet and nothing seems to be perfect, calm down, throw in Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Holly Golightly will inspire you to no ends! It always works for me!

My girlfriend and I were chatting last weekend about her kids and the upcoming school year. However delighted she was at the thought of the house to herself, her daydreams of silence were soon taken over by her list of back to school shopping ‘To-Dos’.. food, clothed, shoes, binders, notebooks, pencils.. on and on. We tried to creatively brainstorm some clothes she could reuse, just take out the hem here and there, but when her sons heard that, one entering second grade and the other going into kindergarten, they were HORRIFIED and quickly shouted/whiles, “Moooommmmmm….. NNNNooooooooo!!!!! Thats SO embarrasing?” We let out simultaneous sighs and went back to square one, trying, along with every other parent and coined ‘Auntie’ to think of ways to budget and prepare for the school season, counting every nickel and dime spent.

Awhile back, I was introduced to a site called moneyStrands, an online tool that brings together all your financial accounts into one place so you have a complete view of the finances you’re working with, etc. So, I thought I’d go back and see if it could help us with the shopping at hand and the budgeting tool moneyStrands offers was just what we were looking for. It’s so easy to have a budget in your mind, but once you hit the stores, see the sale signs and hear, “Mom, I want this and Mom, this is SOOO cool,” the allotted budget is easily flushed down the drain and the oohs and aahs come first.

Before we hit up the stores, we registered online and then got the mobile versions so we could have all our info and budgeting charts IN the stores with us. We were determined not to let the swarms of moms, kids and all the latest and greatest items that her boys wanted get in our way. Me on my iPhone, and Melissa on her Blackberry, set off on a shopping spree, with an allotted budget of $250 for each son. Uniforms = done. School supplies = done. New shoes to show some of their little personalities = done. All while updating each purchase on our phones to be sure we stayed on track, and we did! About $250 per each child on the dot, and with Melissa happy she stayed on budget and the boys happy with what they got, it was too perfect.

We came back early evening that long Saturday with two very excited little boys ready to go off to school and one very happy and proud mother who stayed within her budget. And finally there was me, one happy ‘Auntie’ who enjoys helping friends with their kids and the going home to my quiet apartment, all alone, in silence… and loving every minute of it!